At the beginning of my awakening and transformation it was hard for me to understand. There were no Facebook groups or people around me to check in with. Most of the learning I did was to stop and listen to the inner guidance. Usually this guidance led me to mainstream music. Here is the thing: I am not a singer or songwriter. I can’t sing to keep myself alive, so I had no interest in this type of music. I could sing along to church songs, only because my voice would drown in many others voices and no one would know if I was singing with discord.
It was hard for me to marry my christian beliefs with the worldly music as I was taught to believe. So I rejected most of these messages as I thought they were luring me into places I didn’t want to go. One day in church I had gone to be prayed for over an issue that was troubling me, and my pastor at that time stopped praying and looked at me and said stop resisting God his ways are higher than our ways.
Well you would think I would get it right then but I didn’t, though the words stuck with me. I could not ask him how I was resisting God because I was sure it would be embarrassing if he discovered what was going on in my head. I had never told anyone about my musical experiences of worldly songs when I woke up in the morning. I didn’t want to be perceived as being demon possessed or judged. I worried myself and wondered how I was in resistance for a long time. So I uploaded my way around trying to find the meaning to all this, needless to say it was a lonely and challenging journey.
Here is the thing: Spirit never gave me a complete meaningful answer; it was always a glimpse here and there. Eventually I would come to a place where I could put all those rhema words together and form a complete puzzle then the meaning of it all became clear. My belief is that it was a way to help me transform and find myself. In the process of finding the meaning of these experiences it led me into learning what I need to know. It brought me before many teachers that I would never seek out had it not been for the pieces of the puzzle I was putting together.
Often I would go to people who knew these worldly songs, humming a song that I did not know it’s name or singer. And they will tell me both, they didn’t know why I was asking. Then I would go and Google the lyrics of the song and the life of the singer and pretty soon I started to understand the messages that I was being given. Often when I found this out it was humbling to the core, something shifted within me that’s not explainable with words. I could simply put it as an inner knowing like my path has been lit up and I knew where to go next. I began to accept this as my guidance and stopped fearing that it was leading me astray.
Here is the major thing: it was being courageous enough to ask for help in a way that was understood by those around me and to go out and do my own research without judgement. This guidance also helped to identify my teachers. In learning that, it led me to acceptance of a gift that I had been resisting for a very long time.
I began to understand that Spirit will speak to us in any way, shape or form. The important thing was that we listen and really hear the message without judgement.
Today for me that’s not the only way messages come to me but it helped to evolve beyond what had been socially acceptable for generations. This helped me know the difference between what is taught in our education system and what we really need to learn so we can evolve.
Transformation is not intellectual, it is beyond the level of natural comprehension and everyone of us is capable of this. I learned that we can not measure the ability of someone to help us transform and evolve through the certificates, diplomas, degrees obtained intellectually; they are not of the same order. Transformation goes beyond that, yes it is learned but not in the same way as our education system provides. I am not saying that having a degree, diploma or certificate is wrong but that transformation requires a different kind of learning for it to be purposeful and help us evolve collectively.