What is it about change that scares people? Someone once said that change occurs when the pain of staying the same outweighs the fear of change. But I would like to add that you don’t have to wait for pain in order to change.
Proactivity is a beautiful word. It means taking positive action voluntarily and with joy and ease. Some choose the hard road, where ego and reactivity are allowed to roam free and uninhibited. This road has you living in victim mentality. It’s where life just happens to you and you feel you have no control or say in the matter. Being proactive, on the other hand, means making conscious choices and taking responsibility for your life and experiences. For some, taking responsibility translates into self-blame. But that’s the ego at work again. Think of it this way, if your mind created what you are experiencing now, it can certainly create something else too. It’s actually quite empowering to know that.
When I first started out on a conscious and proactive road of self-discovery and spiritual awakening, there were times when I thought, “Am I losing my identity?” The reason I thought this was because I wasn’t sure if I was playing a role of what was expected of me in terms of “change,” or if I was actually becoming someone else. What I soon realized was that becoming more aware of your spirituality actually allows your true self to shine through. It’s not always so much what you do, as how you do it. I realized that the most important change was to the way I perceived things. I simply became consciously aware of my thoughts, motives, emotions and behavior.
Often one action can have different results based on the consciousness behind it. For example, say person A and person B both set out to buy a car. Person A is motivated by thoughts that this car will make him more liked and accepted by his peers; that he will be the envy of all his friends. Person A thinks that this car will make him happy and fulfilled. What might happen with person A is that, yes, he will buy the car, but the novelty will wear off and he’ll be back to feeling empty inside. What he was seeking had nothing to do with the car at all.
Person B, on the other hand, knows that he is already whole and valuable as a person. He is already happy because he knows that happiness is a choice. He knows that while “things” can certainly encourage one’s happiness, that without self-worth, that happiness will be short-lived. He looks upon this car as an expression of the Divine Mind; a creation that involves many layers of passion and creativity. Person B is appreciative and aware. He knows that the purchase of this car will not only benefit him, but that others will benefit as well (i.e. the designer, the manufacturer, the distributor, the retailer, the economy, his passengers, etc.). He makes his decision with a level head.
Now if you noticed, the act of buying the car was the same. But the consciousness behind it was certainly different. The change made here did not compromise Person B’s identity, nor was he deprived of anything (spirituality does not mean giving up the material world, if anything it means having the best of both worlds. To be truly spiritually active means to be completely fulfilled in all ways). It simply made him into a more conscious person, making decisions from a place of awareness and spirit, rather than reactivity and ego.
This is just one example of how change doesn’t have to be scary. It can benefit your life, and also the lives of all those around you. Remember, you are only transforming your reactive ego nature. All the good stuff you can keep and develop. As you change for the better, so do your surroundings and experiences. Transformation is not a bad word. It will not compromise your identity in any way. It will only make you a stronger, more blessed individual.
So don’t be afraid to look within. Don’t worry about the opinions of others or seeking approval. Don’t even put yourself on a time frame based on someone else’s experiences. Be yourself. Be honest. Venture within and you will find a treasure house of fulfillment that you may have previously thought only existed in a car dealership.